Divorces often become a murky pool of hurt, anger, disgust, anxiety, and other strong emotions that pit people against one another and prevent them from reaching any type of agreement. If you and your partner have been able to agree on mediation in lieu of a courtroom, you are on the right path. However, make sure you understand that things can quickly go south with one wrong move. Prepare yourself beforehand to ensure a smoother process.
Discuss Complicated Topics Before
If you can, discuss the more complicated aspects of the divorce before the mediation, such as child custody. While it's not necessary that you finalize the agreement, at least broaching the subject gives both of you an opportunity to express your feelings and get your emotions out there.
If you wait until the mediation and it's an emotionally driven topic, things could quickly get derailed, and the idea of finalizing the divorce through mediation could get thrown off the table. Have a conversation early to let emotions simmer and help create understanding on both sides.
Walk into the situation with some flexibility. In an ideal world, you would get everything exactly the way you want, but this isn't how it always happens. In a mediation, both people generally must give and take in areas where they may not have originally planned to be successful. When you walk into the session with this mindset, it's much easier to make changes as necessary.
Know what you need, but also be willing to compromise since the goal is getting a divorce faster and at a lower cost than a traditional courtroom. It might also be helpful to consider your ex's needs so that you better determine when you should be more flexible.
Release Your Emotions
Give yourself some time to release some of your emotions. No, you won't get over the idea of divorce right away, but if you start dealing with your emotions, it will be much easier to control them while you're in the mediation session with your ex-partner. Particularly when it comes to anger, if you are unable to control yourself, you likely won't get far in the process.
You could consider therapy, exercise, or some other enrichment activity that allows you to release your feelings and move forward. If you feel yourself getting excited during the mediation session, don't hesitate to ask for a break to give yourself time to reset.
The more prepared you are for the divorce mediation process, the easier the process and the better the outcome. Make sure you're prepared. For more information on mediation, contact a location like the Divorce Mediation Institute of Utah.Share